hmm..how shld i start it?
or shld i just say i am freaking hurt.
bout ur jokes u said?
ur joke bout breaking up is not funny.
u can joke bout other things but not tat.
i guess it didnt went through ur mind that
this type of joke is really hurting.
esp when someone who means so much to me
say this to me,oh..not only me and with other pple arnd too.
i hold my tears in the bus.
not knowing wat to say..
facing the window..
then in the end i ask him to go take bus..
i walk home myself..
while walking through the park,
i cried at the same time frighten...
there is this group of bangladesh look at me.
i was freaking scared..but my mind was in a whirl..
thinking bout wat he said..my heart ache..
till now,my heart still aches..
though lots of my fwen an wei me..
but nevertheless,he affects me alot.
i thought to myself too,"is he really happy that he break up with me?"
his words hit me hard..
hais i don noe anything anymore..
i love him..i cherish him..but wat bout him?

Hell0 =D
hehehes..
today after lesson,dear n i
went to watch the movie 2012
its super nice and exciting.
thumbs up for the movie.
after movie, we went to eat BBQ chicken.
dear's treat..hahas..
then went to ehub to play arcade..
having fun playing the drum n silent hill.
we then went to buy tibits n head to the beach.
we took photos(mostly his unglam) n eat n see sea =)
i finally get to spent more time with him
yea only with him..super love.
we then walk to my home n then he bus home.
love the moment when im with him~
hehes ok bye bye =)

Hello..!
oh well,today im still having flu..
feeling terrible..
anw,later sis having swimming sliver exam.
hahas gd luck to mei mei!=)

update on yesterday...
me having lousy flu..
feel super drowsy..
anw,i pass my digicomm yesterday.
i skip cds lecture yesterday..
i see the timetable yesterday.
it shows lt30..
so dear pei me go lt30..
door lock..then call grace,yessy n mark
to no avail..in the end didnt go.
n in the end found out i go wrong lt..
so went back to clubroom.
dear bought me icecream..hehes..
then he actually want to teach me digicomm.
in the end canot solve..
time wasted..argh..
dear pei digicomm more than me..
&*%*^$(&$..
then he send me to the entrance n he bus home.
its been so long since he tell me he love me le..
the sweet gd nite message was gone too..
i miss his hugs n kisses too..
it seem no diff after his final judging ..
i wish i have more time with him..
without anyone to interfere..=/

hehehes..im in a good mood today.
you know why?
mommy bought me a pink vaio lappy.
im so super duper happy..
its my dream lappy n fave colour.
(*jumping up and down..
screaming in joy*)
and i miss dear =/
where is he?

Hell0..
Grace n i went to rebong our hair..
after that i acc grace to buy some stuff..
n then head down to schl.
most of them said that i look weird
except for daphne..
she say i look cute =) hehes.
dear also finish his final judging.
now he has time to pei me hehes..
n he look shuai today haahas.
and thanks to davin,
instead of helping out for event,
i could pei mydear for very long ..
i feel so happy today.
anyway, dear n i went to meet janice.
went for walk,arcade n then
acc dear for bus 81 to come n then home.

i love you,bf.

hehehes..
FDMP lesson was fun..
took super lots of photos..
super nice ones too..love it..
will upload the photos soon =)
anyway,i hardly see my dear..
super sad..he preparing his final judging
hope tml faster come..
so that when he finish he got time for me =)
anyway,for proj management..
the course was ok..
but the prob lies wih the teacher..
super racist n bias..idiot sia..
kp want to find chance to minus our marks.
if u ask mark,i freaking piss off with the teacher.
im trying my best to score ace for my last cds.
n this teacher spoil it..
after cds,mark n i went back to my clubroom
to finish off the homework..
hahas n mark gave me this NIVEA nourishing cream
hahas didnt noe he buy these type of product.
no wonder his skin so nice..
n i feel bad cos
i complain to mark that i want see my bf..
hahas..but mark super nice (:
mark rating : 5 star!
ok la..but my bf the best..=)
anyway gtg do my project le see ya =)

oh n one last thing,

Well well well..
once a boring day again..
done my hw n revision..
my head still a little hurt from yesterday
thnx to my dear for making me laugh.
i suddenly thought about the future ahead.
many many thoughts here and there.
some stuff were unexpected n worrying.
but whatever changes,i still love him.
nothing change my heart.
my fwen ask me this ques:"
the forest so big,with soo many trees,
why you dont want to consider other guys?"
my ans to him was:
"I only love him,even if there is many trees,
idc,i only want this tree."
My fwen's reply:same same (^-^)
my ans to him was:=.= lol then u still ask
i also believe that dear n i can overcome
ups n down tgt.
(including my wait when he is in NS.)
the only decision left is for piggy to decide.
oh and humph...
dear MISS me ZERO PERCENT!
humph HUMPH HUMMPHH!
i ignore him lor..so sad la..
wheregot bf dont miss gf de..
eeyeerr!!
k la~ i stop here if not i will cont rant...

HII!=D
done my housework finish~
then guess what..
all of us were waiting for my dad
to cook finish lunch.
it took him so long to cook one lunch lor.
by then we were super hungry and complaining.
n at last at 2pm plus,we had our lunch LOL.
now using lappy and piggy online!=D
hahas..go chat with him le =D

Hello milo~
yeap..i feel lousy quarreling
with dad this morning..
he is always so unreasonable,
it pissed me off seriously.
i spilled out some of my unhappiness to him
in the end,he say sorry n hong me..
yet i still feel sad.
then head to prime market to buy food
for CCN day..
Audrey and Davin came.
Really thanks to those who help out in the booth
esp fwens like Qiu Yan and Han Hsiang.
earn a little profit for CCN.
piggy bought me a balloon.
after someone lost the balloon roy gave me =(
hahas..anyway had cup noodles
with my beloved piggy,siqi,weixun n han hsiang.
then bully weixun go throw rubbish
finally CCN has finished!=D
next will be AGM (im the organiser=X)
but AGM still quite long..
i want spend more time with piggy and fwens.
yea...hahas k la gtg le ..seeya~

Im damn pissed with my father.
whats wrong with him?!
i did my housework.
i did my homework.
y cant he just let me do what i want.
wth...
he ask me dont join activities already.
he said that i must well at home
do housework rather then do activities.
like wth..im not slave leh..
i also want to enjoy de..
i did my part..n now he is asking me
to do things which im unwillingly to do.
damn it la..
so what if i done my housework.
he will claim that i never do it..
i fell ,i hurt myself when i do my housework.
i didnt say anything.
he told me that if i got things must tell him.
but how can i share with him my prob when
he is so small minded.
he will just as well ask me go die.
y must i always have to follow what he say.
cant i have my own say?!
now i freaking feel saffocated.
feeling liike sharing with someone.
but hais..i appear ooffline..
have no mood rite now..
my dad dont even trust me.
so y do i care so much..
making an effort to gain his trust!?
its useless anyway..
damn..he treat me like slave,like a fool too.
i seriously hate my life.
if he is willing to do housework,
then stop trying to gain my attention
by showing me that he do housework
then act til so wei da that he done housework.
pls lar!he thinks he is the one doing housework?
i done most of it..
n what he does is only slp..
then say i mop floor not clean
damn it..i didnt even show him the blisters
i got everytime i mop the floor with my stength.
because i noe mommy tired after work.
so i help to so housework,
if not i wouldnt care..
so damn it!!stop telling me what to do.
i freaking wish i have a understanding father.
who trust me,support me,willing to share my prob.
not someone who blame me for everything n vice versa.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
i dont know what the heck im doing,
or saying or wadeva~
i really dont know what im doing for CCN day
even though im one of the organiser.
i have no confidence at all.
im being demoralised.
first thing,food n everything last min settle,
we havent tried the cooker yet.
we cant find cheese too!!
second thing,seriously,
i felt that most of them are not doing their part.
yeap...hais!!
n i vomitted in schl..such luck
damn it...
dear was nice to buy me food to eat..
yea sometimes i will be little demanding.
if u dont like then im sorry..
cos im very tired..seriously tired..
so i might not know what im doing or say.
hais..im freaking confused n dissappointed
at the same time with myself..
FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!
after writing everything on my blog,
i seem to feel better..
ok la i go do CCN stuff le~

Hello (^-^)y
a brand new day,a brand new smile.
n i miss piggy.xoxo.
i hurt my finger while
i was doing housework.
and its super pain plus
a blueblack on it.
anyway,i had done my revision
for networkinfra and proj management.
a round of applause for me =)
a task well done..kudos!
using lappy right at this moment.
change my wishlist.[go see go see~]
and now surfing facebook..
oh gee..im have a craving for buffet!
hehes...BUT,
oh gosh!im turning fatter=X
i nd to have a diet plan.
if not piggy sure say me fat de =(
anyway,thats for today.

whats love?

wasnt feeling well the whole day
hais..stupid day today..
i seriously hate it!
digcomm test i did badly.
real disappointment with myself.
then after bb meeting...
piggy pang seh me!!=(
it really hit me super hard..
i cried..i was super pissed with piggy.
he dont care me at all de..sobs
but in the end,
he kp tickling me then do all sorts
of funny funny stuff..n he did say sorry.
though i am angry but
i love him alot..
its hard for me not to forgive him.
but this does not mean he can take advantage of this
n make me angry..
i just wish that he have time for me..
and care for me =( sobs

i cried n cried n cried.
i pretended i was ok.
but im not.
im freaking sad cos
i dont seem to feel
that u care for me anymore.
damn i seriously hate the feeling.
i wish i can stop anyhow think.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

oh well..
do housework again..
was watching the vampire assistant
while eating..
and then suddenly dc..
guess what =.=...
my movie watch halfway canot load already
argghhh..bang wall..
in the end gave up..
went to do my orgcomm..
and then slacking~
rotting at home..really very sian can =(
plus piggy today busy then he canot chat with me
i super sad =( sobsob..


im falling down the slope..
anyone save me..?

PHOTOS DURING FDMP LESSON. (:

Hello Jello
after lesson head for
poly attachment event.
dear didnt attend his cds..
super upset..was extremely worried for him=(
anyway,
since im programmer with davin n han hsiang
we prepare the games..
and it turn out not bad..
after that ptpt with dear..^-^
saw many familiar faces lor =X
hohoho...eat subway eat fresh..
chose a different set meal..
and it turn out not really nice..
after dinner,we shop shop..
thenn home sweet home..
dad nag at me
after knowing that my laptop
is beyond repair and had to get a new one.
=( =( =(
oh and yes!=)
hohoho..

this is my not confirm list of christmas wishlist:

Done lots of housework today.
body aching all over now.>.<
hmm..lucky im able to slack at home
and not go to school today...
if not i confirm cui~
watch one litre of tears movie.
it make me pour one litre of my own tears out.
super touching..
anyway, im waiting for piggy to online chat chat with me =D
waiting in progress~

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------♥

continue...

hais hais and hais..
i feel so emoish right now..
guess i really think alot...
think too much le..
ahhhh...=/
joel pls stop anyhow think le..
=( i feel so lousy..
piggy,i want you beside me now =(

Hello mello!~
today netinfra class was =(
teacher kp calling my name.
so crappy la~
anyway today nothing much..
much of a sianzation.
and then BB meeting..
cds lecture,eat cup noodles,
and piggy send me home..
and one sad thing..=(=(=(
i lost my fave pink pouch..
must have drop it in bus..
freaking damn sad...sobx..


btw,

shhiiook~
had more than 10 hrs of slp
was suppose to wake up at 8.30pm
to do club stuff..
ended up slping like pig the whole night.
was so so tired after halloween camp.
ended up today i had no voice again
ok here my update on the preparaion and
the days on halloween camp.(:

Thurs-29th Oct09

Had lesson from 9am to 8pm..
i wanted to thank mark..
didnt know him well in cds class.
however,he was caring enough to
give me his cough sweet n
ended up he didnt have one for himself.
and ask me to take care.
and so coicidence that he is tingfong classmate.
anyway after lessons,
we went to tamp to eat our dinner.
purchase our log stuff and then back to schl
grace and i pack till morning while aud do her program.
yessy,lq davin were slping by then..
after that we were next to slp..

Fri-30st Oct09

Move all our log stuff to log room.
by then the camp had start their ice breaking.
had a quick lunch with grace.
when the games start,
we help out in the night walk.
though it was tiring moving all things,
but it was nice cos i can cut some fats =X
hahas.but we were also confuse
cos if the layout of the night walk.
ended up move wrong classroom
and do wrong classroom..
and we didnt know what to do also..
by the time,we help the programmer
to finish up covering the classrooms
it was raining heavily ..
joel(guy) and i carry the mask down
to the concourse for mask making activity.
i took some photos while the participants
were painting their mask.
as i had nothing to do..
the masks that they make was wonderful.
except i keep teasing yong liang that
his mask was ugly hahahas.
after that it was night walk..
i went to help out in the lt
watch trick or treat then coming soon
i watch halfway then didnt watch cos
need to do help out too..
another reason is that im scared too.
then one of the participant ask me for pen
so i help him.
i was freak out la..
simply i jump out of my wits
when i saw a person stand at one side.
(i freaking thought is ghost ..after watching
coming soon =/)
ended up is LQ =.=
my bf scare me out of my wits =(
then after night walk and everything,
we logistic played drink water game..
super duper fun.
then lq and davin and we log
went to bathe and then
some of us eat cup noodles..
it was 6 plus am..
its like omg..miracle..
i am actually still awake at this timing.
but by then actually i cmi le..
i bom on the slping bag.
next thing i know,
im slping like pig already..

Sat-31st Oct09

i woke up finding myself and joel(guy)
the only one slping..the rest were awake..
and then lq went to slp after i woke up
i went to assign the walkies..
and then find one slping bag to slp.
was feeling bad making grace do the log
moreover she didnt slp at all
had my breakfast at the staircase
sitting there alone in a daze while eating.
then grace and i pack the things back to clubroom
later on,we head to the lt.
watch the particiants do their skits
and prize giving.
and then carry on our packing.
eat burger king with lq.
then stupid things came out.
so sorry to lq and thank him
then ate my dinner and sleep.

I REALLY WANT TO THANK THE LOGISTIC TEAM.
THANKS FOR HELPING OUT IN THE CAMP.
YOUR HELP IS APPRECIATED.
I ACTUALLY HAD FUN IN LOGISTIC HAHAS.
AND ESP AH SENG AND YONG QIANG.
BOTH OF YOU HELP US ALOT BEFORE
THE CAMP STARTS..
REALLY A BIG BIG THANK YOU TO THE BOTH OF U.(: