I dont know where to begin but then

yesterday was my bf birthday.right.

we went to the mint museum with him and my sis

and then my sis wanted to play wii so we went.

and bf was inside his room and then when home

he send us home.

well i could say i was sad,disappointed.

i know that he was tired.I am too

i freaking spend 1 month to plan his birthday.

And yesterday, i was tired too ok?

i came menses 2nd day(meant the most flow of all)

My body was aching so badly but

i still want to make his birthday a wonderful one.

i these few days because his birthday is nearing

i spend my time for his birthday planning till 12 am

my buddy kp say me complain me that i hadn't had time for our blogshop

i only had a word sorry and felt guilty

because bf is my priority so is his birthday.

so i swallowed all the blames and complains.

Went to research and research for special events

finally i found this GROUPON website my buddy recommend

i everyday went to this website to searchFinally i found one

MINT MUSEUM.(thought it could be fun.)

i quickly went to ask around for GROUPON acc.

i was Ganchiong like spider cos only left 30 mins before it ends.

LUCKILY, Xinyi got acc so i paid her.and so i got the tickets.

The cake part,i spend the most money on buying several ingredients.

i tried many cakes sample and it works.

I cancelled my meeting with meiqi(my best friend)

Just to bake the cake for him for his next day birthday.

and i havent been going been going out with her since she enter NTU.

ok back to topic, i bake the cake till 11plus pm right after work.

I didnt have the time to rest!!!for damn good sake.

i even lose my temper to my mom

because the cake failed and i told her the cake is very impt to me.

and i can't give up and i nd to make this cake working.

and there the cake.

But yesterday it was like a failed plan he come out of his room

then we celebrate his birthday with the cake and then

he is back to his room using comp!!!

I make the card and there he doesn't appreciate

all along i was holding his card for him and then at home he just

place it one side.

All my plans all that i done for one month without having few hours slp.

i can see he doesn't appreciate it at all.All my fucking plan

ALL was gone to waste.

If i know, i shouldn't have gone wasting my one freaking month

having my head cracking for his birthday and all the %^*%&*& from my buddy

and rejections from my friends when they ask me out.

If i know i should just buy present and cake which only cost 1 day

and then i pass him the present and sing song eat cake and he could go and have his sleep.

or either i dont meet him at all and he could go meet his friends

maybe he could have been much happier.

Because of this, i felt that my one month plan failed so much

i cried at night till morning.i cried when i wake up i cred when i vaccum the floor

luckily my parent were out and my sis was playing the comp.

I feel so disappointed and awful because the tireless one moneth of my preparation for him

HE DONT EVEN APPRECIATE!he only bother bout his comp and slp.

im freaking tired too.maybe i shouldn't have care for him at all

i care so much for him and yet...

maybe this saying is true

"the one who care less is the one who holds the power"

*sob sob sob*